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Kin Dza Dza
Arguably, it's the best sci fi comedy ever made and yet it's also the most famous film that nobody has ever heard of! Kin Dza Dza is a giant of science fiction and near the top of all good sci fi movie lists. If you like good, unusual cult sci fi -you need to see this film! Checkout the SadCAST review of Kin Dza Dza or click the links below to see the film on the Mosfilm Youtube channel.
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00-911 The Misadventures of Agent When Part 6
I ask forgiveness for my terrible ignorance of Geography (in the sense that I've ignored it)Uber_Vixen rubbed a tired eye as she pondered whether or not 'perfidy' was actually a word. There would be time for dictionaries later. She was at least grateful for the small amount of time she'd been allowed to clean the drool from her dress and brush her messy hair. She promised herself she would try not to think about the trio of treats she would hopefully get if everything went according to plan. Well, maybe just one thought. Mmmm... *Drool*
"Are you alright?" Diva asked. "Huh! YES! Fine. Absolutely fine!"
A small patch of drool had reappeared on Vixen's dress. She frowned and wiped at it a bit pathetically. Diva raised an eyebrow and resumed staring out her moth eye window at the terrain rushing past below. "Where is Prince?" she asked after a while.
Vixen yawned. "Oh, I dunno. He's prolly floating around somewhere. I'm sure he'll be here soon." And if he isn't then all the better for me. Who's to know if I enact the rest of Prince's plan myself. I'll just step in where he was meant to be, and hoorah, may horror and pain befall you all! Vixen smirked. he cockpit fell silent again. Vixen sighed. "So. Tell me a little about yourself. Where do you come from?"
"I am Zev Bellringer of B3K. I grew up in a box...." Zev started rambling on with her little sob story and Vixen zoned out. At least it was better than silence. She threw in the occasional
"Oh, that's horrible" or "Ohhh" or "Wow" without paying much attention, but the love slave didn't seem to notice. Suddenly she felt a warm tongue lick her cheek and someone sniff at her hair. She spun in her seat, causing the moth to swerve. (Again! Don't let me on the road!).
"Hello Vixen, Diva," Prince spoke softly in his divine British accent. Sitting between the two chairs, he gave them both a charming smile.
"Prince, you are here!" Diva exclaimed. She leaned in closely and toyed with his blue ruffled shirt. Uber_Vixen scowled.
"Did you doubt that I'd return?" he mused, glancing at Vixen. She gave him a depraved grin and returned her attention to the sky. So he knows. Ha! What does he expect. I saw a chance and I took it. He can't get rid of me. He needs me.
"My... Your plan is still in effect. We have had to change our itinerary. It looks as though the Acme Agents will never make it to Germany, so we are going to them. We expect they will take quite a bit of time in Halifax - that is if they ever get there! So we have moved our operation there."
"Perhaps you should brief Diva now. There are still a few hours before we reach the Canadian coast." Prince chuckled with an amused smile on his face. Vixen certainly liked being in control. That should assuredly be interesting later he thought... He leaned in towards Diva and licked her ear. Vixen's eye twitched as Prince launched softly into his speech. Vixen leaned back and concentrated on flying. She had heard it all before. She wondered how desperate Diva must be to fall for Prince's lies. At least I wasn't thick enough to not see he was trying to use me. I'm sure he'd agree we work better together with that certain level of honesty. Why bother lying if you're both evil? Vixen blushed as she gripped the moth's joystick between Prince's legs. Fanning her heated face she turned away from Prince and Diva to hide her reddened face. The pair finally stopped talking and Prince sat back up straight. Black swirled at the corner of Diva's eyes. Vixen could not help from glancing back to her hand on the joystick a couple of times. Prince gave her a knowing look, causing another blushing fit. So ruled by her feelings. All of them, so easily manipulated. Diva will do exactly as I tell her, she is so driven by desire. And as long as I remain unattainable, she will continue to be ordered about, willingly. Jim wont be able to resist her love slave charms, and then he will be her puppet, and her, mine. And with Jim under the control of my nanites, the closer I will be to having the key. Vixen glanced at Prince, lost in thought. Her jealousy was getting the better of her, although she found having her hand where it was a major triumph. Diva had noticed and growled at her like a clusterlizard. The moth flew low over trees. The crossed over a highway, where a black car had stopped. Two identical figures sat in the back next to a resigned looking woman. Another woman and man bickered in the front seat. The proximity warning beeped louder and faster on the console as they flew undetected over the vehicle. "The Acme Agents," Vixen noted. "Still no where near Halifax. Obviously Bryn has been driving."
"And it seems he's driving still," Prince chuckled as they curved towards Nova Scotia. "They seem to be headed in the opposite direction. All the more time for us to prepare." Diva smiled adoringly at Prince. Vixen rolled her eyes and watched the ground. They passed back near the highway where two lone figures trudged along. One was rather sweaty in a full rubber suit, and carrying a box held at arms length. The other, a woman, glided along beside the man, eyes scanning the trees to either side of the road. She directed the moth away before they were close enough to be noticed. "We'll be in Halifax in about 4 hours. Just sit back a relax folks and please, enjoy your flight with Vinx-Air." ~~~~~ Fifi sat up and tenderly probed his swollen eye. That bitch Diva knocked me out! Worse than the carrots... He slowly stood up. I'll show that cheap tramp and her stupid Prince exactly why they shouldn't piss me off. Fifi stormed out of the cryopod chamber with a hand to one eye, bumping into robots and kicking drones on his way to the moth hanger. ~~~~~ Vixen set the moth down behind the Halifax Care Facility For Mentally Ill Actors. Jim Hirshfield was inside, unaware of the danger that waited for him. The trio climbed out of the moth into the cool air of Nova Scotia. Vixen shivered and subtly moved closer to Prince. She noticed that Diva did the same. Diva stared at everything around her, especially at the business district spread out behind them. Vixen frowned. "What, don't you have any curiosity? Any sense of adventure?" she mocked.
"There are more important things to think about," Prince intoned. Diva pouted, but complied. They strode into the foyer of the care facility and approached the nurse at the desk.
"We are here to see James Hattersfield."
"Are you family?" the nurse asked distractedly, head bowed over paperwork. Prince glanced at Vixen. "You could say that," Diva spoke up.
"Visiting hours are over in 2 hours. He's in room 769." Prince and Vixens' eyes met, eyebrows raised. "He...requested that room?"
"No, rooms are assigned to our patients," the nurse said irritably, without looking up.
"Interesting," Prince said softly. The nurse pointed down a hallway without even looking at the three and they made their way towards Jim's room. Prince whispered something to Diva and she nodded enthusiastically. The door was open and Jim sat on his bed talking to himself. Prince sniffed the air. "Xavia. What a surprise." Vixen jumped forward ready to strike out, but froze at the last minute. Her eyes blackened as she stepped back into line with Prince.
"Prince. What are you doing here?" Xavia stepped out from behind the door.
"Vixen!" She scowled, and then clusterlizard-growled as Diva stepped into view.
"You. What is she doing here?" Diva jumped forward and pushed into Xavia. They collapsed into a heap on the ground, and Xavia clusterlizard-rolled around the room and up a wall. Diva reached out and grabbed her leg, causing Xavia to whip forward and crack her head against a chair. She slumped to the floor and Prince nodded to Diva and he and a still black-eyed Vixen carried Xavia out to the moth. Jim had not stirred or noticed the action around him. He looked up dazed though at Diva's approach. "Please! No torture. I'm allergic to pain!" he shouted, recoiling on the bed. "Diva, Diva!? Sweet love muff muffin, it's you!" He dropped off the bed to his knees and hugged her around her waist. "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this!" Diva smiled and stroked back his hair. "Now that you are a man, a real man, I feel different towards you." She pulled Jim to his feet and gazed into his eyes. "790. Jim. I want you to be the first man..." ~~~~~ Vixen staggered away from Prince and the moth now containing Xavia. She couldn't believe what had happened. Prince's nanites in her blood?! How dare he! She dropped to her knees and rested in the dust for a moment. "You didn't think I wasn't aware of your...perfidious nature?" Prince said from behind her. "Of...of course not. I have always held our...relationship higher than all of the backstabbing. But this? You've gone to far!" She rose and turned to face his pierced lip. She stared transfixed and her resolve weakened.
"My lip isn't my only piercing," he said quietly and leaned in towards her. "I'm *very* good with pain." Vixen swallowed nervously and stared at the ground.
"You can't charm your way out of this. I'm really, really hurt."
"I took necessary measures to ensure that you wouldn't act rashly."
"Fine. Let's just get this finished. How long will Diva be?"
"Not long," Prince said distractedly, staring at the sky.
"By the way, what happened to Fifi?" Vixen looked up at an approaching speck in the sky. "But he would have been out for hours. Diva was..she didn't like him very much, needless to say. I guess carrying the weight of one, he must have made better distance than we did."
"I wonder what he is planning to do." Prince strode towards the moth. "I will take Xavia to a more secure location. Hold Fifi off until I return and if I don't, come to me in my tower." Vixen nodded and shielded her eyes from the dust stirred by the moths launch. What will Fifi try to do in his confrontation with Vixen and Prince? What are Diva and Jim getting up to in his room? Will the Acme gang ever make it to Halifax? Will Fourth and Lyekka have to walk the entire way? All these questions answered sometime in 00/911 The Misadventures of Agent When!