Lexx and Life
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All I need to know in life I learned from Lexx.
(d’ya remember those inspirational posters from about 5 years ago? ‘All I need to know in life I learned in..’ blah?)1: Don’t wait around to have sex. Find a nice planet full of monks. [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img]
2: Sure, your robot head pledges eternal love [i]now[/i], but robot heads are fickle. He’ll throw you over for a dead guy anyday.
3: Just when you think your day can’t get worse, the universe is ending and you can’t find your hat, it can. You could be infected by alien parasites!
4: Be nice to the people you care about. You could all get killed by a crazed undead assasain any moment.
5: Appearence is a bad guide to character. Xev used to be ugly, she used to be a bowl of custard, but she’s always been a sweet girl. Be nice or she’ll eat your brain.
6: Even pretty people can be sad.
7: Stay away from pattern kids. You don’t want an alien parasite eating your brain.
8: When a carnivorous plant starts talking about ‘small furry animals’ IT’S NOT AN INNUNDO!
9: Don’t save your virginity for people for whom sex is only an intellectual concept.
10: Theocratic fascism is bad. Especially when your leader isn’t even human.
Too bad Lexx never told us about hangover remidies.
lmao!! [img]images/smiles/icon_smile.gif[/img]
Excellent list Hypatia (it looks like you’ve been watching the DVDs). And those are actually a pretty good set of guidelines to follow in life. [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img]
Terrific Guidelines, do I have your permission to print it out, laminate it and hang it over my desk? Thanks!! [img]images/smiles/icon_smile.gif[/img]
Sure, print it out. I’m flattered.
I thought of another way to work yourself out of a moral crisis, ask “What Would Xev Do?”
WWXD or
WWSD (What Would Stan Do?)
WWHDSD (What Would His Divine Shadow Do?)For instance, your friend’s girlfriend seems really interested in you, and you her, but there’s your friend to think of. WWHDSD?
Funny list, Hypatia. I have a few things I’ve learned from watching [i]Lexx[/i] (then again, I knew a lot of them already).
25. There are two universes.
24. People have no respect for emotionless logic. (Already knew that)
23. If a girl has a Cluster tattoo, she’ll suck your neck.
22. If a [b]guy[/b] has a Cluster tattoo…never mind.
21. Nine year old kids can fly spaceships. (Also works for things I learned from watching [i]Star Wars: The Phantom Menace[/i])
20. Sex is a lot like death. (Expected that)
19. Don’t mess with Zev.
18. Be careful who you have sex with, they could be an evil shapeshifting demon who wants to steal your key.
17. There’s a lot of sound in space.
16. The dead are easily fooled.
15. If a girl says “I like you,” be wary. (Already knew that)
14. It’s not easy being the last of your race.
13. Pledging yourself eternally to someone won’t prevent them from walking away. (Already knew that)
12. When Venus and Mars disappear from the sky, the Red Fool, the Dark Man, and the Dead One will walk the Earth. (I better write that down right now…)
11. Just because a song has no real words doesn’t mean it won’t be hard as hell to get out of your head.
10. Cannibals are everywhere.
9. Hillbillies are everywhere.
8. There’s too much sex in the universe(s). (Already knew that)
7. Never lean against a pane of glass when the Eye of Harmony is open. (Wait, that’s things I learned from watching [i]Doctor Who[/i])
6. Bells and rap music mean everything’s okay.
5. The president is a moron. (Already knew that)
4. [b]Never[/b] mess with Zev.
3. Insects are cool. (Already knew that)
2. The wheel doth turn.
1. Life isn’t fair.By the way, I think Kai would make the best spiritual guide. Of course, since seventh grade, whenever I was unsure of what was right, I’ve always thought to myself “What would Spock do in this situation?”
[ 11-11-2001: Message edited by: DalekTek790 ]
Reminds me of my old Star Trek Excuse Shirt.
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