Christmas cake recipe-BYOB

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Try this recipe for Christmas Cake:
Ingredients:
1 Cup of Water
1 Teaspoon of Baking Soda
1 Cup of Sugar
1 Teaspoon of Salt
1 Cup of Brown Sugar
1 Cup of Butter
1 Bottle of Vodka
1 Large Lemon
4 Large Eggs
1 Bag of mixed nuts
2 Cups of mixed Fruit

Instructions:
1 . Sample the Vodka to ensure it’s quality.
2 . Take a Large Mixing Bowl
3 . Check the Vodka again. To be sure it’s of the highest quality pour one level cup, and drink.
4 . Repeat 3.
5 . Turn on the eccentric mixer. Beat one cup of bu-butter in a large fluffy bowl.
6 . Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it’s best to check if the Vodka is shtillll ok.
7 . Try another cup..just in case.
8 . Turn off the mixerer
9 . Break two leggs and add to the bowl and throw i! n ! the fried druit.
10. Pick the fruit back up off the floor.
11. Mix on the turnerer
12. If the fried druit get shtuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a screwscriver.
13. Sample the Vodka to check for tonsisticity Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sh!t. Check
the fuggin Vodka to be absulately involved in it . Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one large table. Add a spoon of sugar or somfink, whatever you can find, gravy will do. Greash the Oven, and **** in the fridge.Turn the cake tin 360 degrees, but try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the >turnerer. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Vodka and >kick the cat.
Fall into Bed…………… Cherry Mistmas.

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[ 15-01-2002: Message edited by: mary beth ]