Vlad spoilers
- This topic has 12 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 23 years, 6 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
ur crew gets back to the Lexx. “Out of my way! My circuts are shorting. Kai, let me circut your shorts” greets 790.”Guess who got lucky while we were away” Stan taunts 790. 790 tells Stan that if he only had teeth-“and theres some dead flesh I would like to nibble on as well”. “We just came from a place called Transylvania where people bite each other a lot” says Xev. “Did anyone try to bite my sweet sweet stud” “No, but my protoblood is running down. I must go refresh it”. Xev follows.
On the bridge with only 790, Stan starts acting strangly and we see why. The goth chicks are dancing around a fire, calling “Stanley Tweedle, feel the urge, join us” etc. Stan drops 790 “I’m feeling an urge” he says and walks away.
Xev wants to freeze Kai. As Kai replentishes his protoblood, he and Xev talk about Stan, who is acting strange.Kai doesn’t think Stan is o.k. Kai tells Xev that he didn’t find what he was looking for, but perhaps it didn’t want to be found. “If it was another divine assasian, could it hurt you?” Xev asks. “It could hurt us all” says Kai. They should be safe on the Lexx, but Xev and Stan shouldn’t go back down without him. “Sweet dreams” she says
The Goth girls try to summon Stan but it isn’t working. “Maybe he’s pure of heart” suggests one. “No, we have to get closer to him” they dance around the fire and chant “In thunder lightning and in rain” “In mountain valley and on the plain” “In snow and fog and on the train”- they berate the inept one and try again.
This time it works, they send some smokey, wispy thing up to Lexx and it weaves around the ship. Past the cryochamber, past Xev’s bedroom where she is sleeping (in a blue velvet bra lined with fake fur) and into Stan’s room, where he is sleeping. He wakes up and hears noises, as the goth girls appear and disappear around him. He see’s 790, who says “In lightning thunder on the train” and rolls away. Stan heads to the bridge. He is greeted by a goth Xev (really Muffy), wierd looking 790 and Kai. They reveal that they are indeed the goth chicks. ‘Kai’ takes down his hair and kisses Stan! (Michal M has a really funny, slightly disgusted look on his face). Stan runs to a moth and flies away, to “clear my mind”. Somthing is controlling him, tho, and he heads to Earth.quote:
Originally posted by Hypatia:
ur crew gets back to the Lexx. “Out of my way! My circuts are shorting. Kai, let me circut your shorts” greets 790.”Guess who got lucky while we were away” Stan taunts 790. 790 tells Stan that if he only had teeth-“and theres some dead flesh I would like to nibble on as well”. “We just came from a place called Transylvania where people bite each other a lot” says Xev. “Did anyone try to bite my sweet sweet stud” “No, but my protoblood is running down. I must go refresh it”. Xev follows.
On the bridge with only 790, Stan starts acting strangly and we see why. The goth chicks are dancing around a fire, calling “Stanley Tweedle, feel the urge, join us” etc. Stan drops 790 “I’m feeling an urge” he says and walks away.
Xev wants to freeze Kai. As Kai replentishes his protoblood, he and Xev talk about Stan, who is acting strange.Kai doesn’t think Stan is o.k. Kai tells Xev that he didn’t find what he was looking for, but perhaps it didn’t want to be found. “If it was another divine assasian, could it hurt you?” Xev asks. “It could hurt us all” says Kai. They should be safe on the Lexx, but Xev and Stan shouldn’t go back down without him. “Sweet dreams” she says
The Goth girls try to summon Stan but it isn’t working. “Maybe he’s pure of heart” suggests one. “No, we have to get closer to him” they dance around the fire and chant “In thunder lightning and in rain” “In mountain valley and on the plain” “In snow and fog and on the train”- they berate the inept one and try again.
This time it works, they send some smokey, wispy thing up to Lexx and it weaves around the ship. Past the cryochamber, past Xev’s bedroom where she is sleeping (in a blue velvet bra lined with fake fur) and into Stan’s room, where he is sleeping. He wakes up and hears noises, as the goth girls appear and disappear around him. He see’s 790, who says “In lightning thunder on the train” and rolls away. Stan heads to the bridge. He is greeted by a goth Xev (really Muffy), wierd looking 790 and Kai. They reveal that they are indeed the goth chicks. ‘Kai’ takes down his hair and kisses Stan! (Michal M has a really funny, slightly disgusted look on his face). Stan runs to a moth and flies away, to “clear my mind”. Somthing is controlling him, tho, and he heads to Earth.
Hehe, reading your update the fourth time is just as good as reading the first one, sounds like one kick-ass ep (with Kai receiving most of the ass kicking!!!), can’t wait to read the rest of your update…thanx hypatia.
Squishy drooling[img]images/smiles/icon_smile.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_razz.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img]
[img]images/smiles/icon_eek.gif[/img] kai lets down his natty bun and locks lips with Stan for at least 15 seconds, aargh! now [i]that’s[/i] a image that will haunt me the rest of my life! [img]images/smiles/icon_eek.gif[/img]
quote:
Originally posted by brainplague:
[img]images/smiles/icon_eek.gif[/img] kai lets down his natty bun and locks lips with Stan for at least 15 seconds, aargh! now [i]that’s[/i] a image that will haunt me the rest of my life! [img]images/smiles/icon_eek.gif[/img]
how about the set on stan [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img] scared me it did …
cute nips though… [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
[ 08-09-2001: Message edited by: FX ]
Sorry for the delay.
The moth lands in Transylvania by the goth girls. Stan gets up and walks over to them. “You will help us revive our lady” says Dravinia and licks his face. “I am not your slave” says Stan. “Stanley, bark like a dog” says Dravinia. “Woof” says Stan, losing the battle. They all get in the moth and head to Lexx.
Stan shows them the bridge “Wow, you could like film the skankiest video in here” says the inept one (Muffy). The other two look at her. Stan seems to have gotten part of his will back, because he gives them a ” little Stan would like to cut short the tour of this ship and take a tour of your lovely white bodies” They remind him (by grabbing and twisting ‘little Stan’) that they came for protoblood.
They enter the cryochamber, where Muffy and Mandaroga start licking Kai’s cryopod. Dravinia takes Kai’s protoblood. Then she has Stan say “Stanley Tweedle has been a bad boy. Stanley Tweedle is hankering for a spankering” he repeats after her. “A hard one” “Ooh yeah, a hard one”. She hits him (hard) on the head. They try to leave. But Muffy’s lips are stuck to the cryopod and they pull her off (ouch! not that she didn’t deserve it).
790 wakes up “Sombody is messing with my man Kai”. He races off (on his little cart thing) making siren noises. This wakes up Xev, who runs to the cryochamber. Kai wakes up, “My protobloodd is gone” Xev chases the goth chicks but they fly away in the moth.
I know there is more to come Hypatia, but thanx thus far, I can see what MM was saying about making those who knocked Lexx eat their words.
This sounds like a stonker of an ep, the people who said it’s the best yet can’t be far wrong.
Looking forward to your next installment.
Salivating Squishy [img]images/smiles/icon_razz.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_razz.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_razz.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img]Xev watches the girls fly away. “Those were the three girls from Dracul’s castle” she says “They are the servants of my hunter. They will bring my hunter life” Kai replys.
Xev and Kai hook Stan up to the protien regenerator. He comes to “Wow I’m having the wierdest dreams” Kai leans over abd puts a tube in his mouth “You’re not going to kiss me again?” Stan asks. “790, configure the protien regenerator to see how the girls were controlling Stan” . “Find anything unusual?” Xev asks 790. “Yes. There are 32 different types of parasites and viruses infecting his body. No wonder he stinks” “I am looking for somthing more specific. A neurochemical messenger that would open him up to controal or suggestion by others” Kai replies. “You mean somthing like this, my love?” 790 shows some sort of (bug like?) thing to Kai. “Parablood” Kai says “A small portion of it is ,ick, dissolved in a female human’s saliva” 790 explains. “They give thier masters gift with a kiss” Kai says. “Well they were cute girls, how was I supposed to resist?” “I was not feeling sorry for you, I was feeling sorry for them” -790. Kai walks away, Xev follows. “I love him when he’s moody” says the lovestruck robothead to Stan.
Xev and Kai walk thru the passageway. “It is not safe to come” he says. “I know you think Stan and I are just ordinary humans. But you’re wrong. I’m half cluster lizard, and if you think I’m just going to stay on the Lexx knowing you might be in trouble you’re wrong”. “When I saw the figure Dr. Longbore showed me, I suspected. And the presence of parablood in Stan confirms my suspicians” “It’s another Divine Assasain like you, isn’t it?” she asks. “I cannot feel fear. But when I know why that assasain was blooded, I know what fear is.” Vlad was a Divine Executioner, bred to hunt assasains who failed to serve his Shadow’s purposes.
The divine executioner needs protoblood, and controals it’s servants with a biovenom
called parablood. “You are strong in many ways Xev, but you are not strong enough to fight a Divine Excecutioner. The Earth is likely doomed”. “Then why not leave with us on the Lexx?” she asks. He gets in the moth and says “Given a chance, she will set fire to the house of man. If a Divine Assasain is death incarnate, a Divine Executioner is the apocalypse made flesh” Which does it for Xev. She gets in too and they head to Earth.Back in the castle, the goth chicks give Vlad Kai’s protoblood. She guzzles it like Jenna Bush with a 12 pack of Zima, and changes from being all wrinkled to being young looking. The goth chicks tell her that her gift runs weak in their veins, and remind her that she promised to bite them again. “I will not keep that promise. But I have a greater gift for you” Vlad says, protoblood (which looks like gazpacho, IMO) dribbling out of her mouth. The goth chicks bicker about who go’s first. “How about all three at once?” Vlad suggests “Cool” they say. “Cool” Vlad repeats, one of her clawlike hands turns into a knife. “I worship his Divine Shadow” she says and turns to them. The camera pans out and we hear three screams from the castle.
Kai and Xev get to the castle, where Xev notices the Divine order symbol. It is a opening, and Kai tells Xev to go look through Father Boscht’s papers to find somthing usefull. “Farewell, Xev” he calls and jumps
out of the moth and into the opening.Back on the Lexx, Stan tells Lexx to blow up Earth without hesitation if he (Lexx) sees anything evil coming from it. “You know somthing?” asks 790. “From the time you were the arch-traitor Stanley Tweedle, reviled by the whole Light Universe, you’ve gone downhill”
Edited ’cause I left out the goth chicks the first time
[ 08-09-2001: Message edited by: Hypatia ]
Kai lands in the castle, near Vlad’s cryopod. She is literally too fast for him, appearing near him and disappearing before he can even see her. “I knew you would come, I felt it” she calls. “Show yourself” he challenges. “Soon” is the reply. “Lets play, before we dine. Before I dine. You think you can destroy me, you think you can hunt the hunter?” “I know what you will do to the people of this planet if you have more protoblood” “I have more protoblood. And you merely suspect what I will do”. What she will do is infect the village with parablood, instructing them to infect others. “And when every mother father son and daughter of the human race that pollutes this sphere is in my power, I will instruct them to visit upon themselves a suicidal horror they never in their darkest dreams imagined. And destroying the last of the Brunnin-G will be the headstone on my satisfaction”. As she says this, she is appearing and disappearing as he tries to find her.
“You can never be satisfied” Kai tells her. “True”. “How did you know I would come here?”he asks, brace out and ready to fire. “The Time Prophet told me, before I killed her”
She is behind a pillar, waiting. “How did you come here” he asks, trying to track her by her voice. “I located a bruise in the time/space fabris that separates the light universe from this dark one”
He has found her, he is on the opposite side of the pillar.
“My killing you will not just be an act of vengance, it will be an act of necessity” he says. “You’re sounding very motivated for a Divine Assasian”“As I am dead, I do not feel emotion. But having recovered my memories, I understand the difference between good and evil. And I know that I must destroy you. Call that motivation if you will” He rounds the pillar, aims his brace and fires. At thin air.
She’s standing in the hall, he fires again and hits her forhead. The wound automatically heals. “But you cannot destroy me. I was built to destroy you, and you were built to be destroyed by me. That is, what is. Said the cat to the mouse” She fires some sort of dagger at him.And we cut to Xev. Xev enters the tavern and says “Vlad is risen. You must all get away from here as soon as you can as fast as you can” Nobody pays attention to her, so she walks up to Van Helsing. “The three girls bit Stan on the neck, and they took Kai’s protoblood and gave it to Vlad, and now she wants to kill everyone on this planet-” Van Helsing tells her that she’s completly dissociated from reality, to a degree that exceeds what even he is used to. She tries to tell him more- he cuts her off and tells her that his family fought vampires, he dosen’t “I’m a bartender, I sell drinks. And you look like you could do with a stiff one” Xev accepts, and gets him to go through Father Borsht’s papers with her.
He shows her into Borsht’s room “This room contains the full acessory kit of a very paranoid and deranged mind. You should feel at home here”.”Hmph”. “I’m assuming that my family’s disease skips the odd generation. That is why I don’t have any children. Which dosen’t mean I’m above a little play in the hay” He sits down next to her. “Read this” she says. “You can’t read?” “In the wife bank on B3K they taught us everything we needed to please a man in bed” Xev says by way of reply.
Back at the castle, Kai fires his brace again. It sticks in her flesh and she grabs on and throws him across the room.
We cut back to the inn, where Xev sees the Divine order symbol in father Borsct’s diary. Van Helsing reads “As he lay dying, he pulled me close and whispered ‘The beast cannot dim the light of a pure heart'” Xev realizes that “Kai dosen’t have a heart, just a pump for his protoblood”. She runs out, Van Helsing follows her and tells her that “I wouldn’t mind a little shag with you, even if you do have a few bats in your belfry” (Great pickup line!). ” Whats a shag?” Xev asks. “A shag, is sex” “I like sex. A lot. But first I have to save Kai” They head out to the moth, parked outside the pub. “Whats that?” “A moth” “Rather big for a moth”. Van Helsing seems to take her a little more seriously now.
Kai is losing, Vlad tells him that the moment she felt protoblood churning through her veins she knew it was all she wanted. Kai tells her that she will always seek protoblood and can never be satisfied. and just as Vlad draws out her long (whatever it was. It looked kinda like the worms from Eating Pattern, only much longer) to suck Kai’s protoblood, he fires his brace up and lands on the roof. She flys after, and they fight some more. Kai pulls off a lightning rod, holds it in the air until it is electrified and stabs her with it. Dosn’t work, she grabs him and starts to drain his protoblood, also stroking his cheek. “I am Kai, last of the Brunnin-G. I killed His Shadow, the insect enemy of mankind” She is startled, “His Shadow is dead?” There is no point to her plan to destroy the human race anymore, Kai tells her. “Yes, but there still is pleasure in it”. Lightning strikes them and they fall. Kai hits the ground, Vlad hears the moth and go’s into the castle.
Xev gives one of the moths to Van Helsing and tells him to fly it away so that Vlad can’t get it. He does.
Xev finds Kai and drags him to the moth. They head back to Lexx.
Vlad flys up to Van Helsing’s moth and dumps him out. She flys to the Lexx.
Xev tells Stan that she and Kai are coming. Stan tells the Lexx not to blow up any moths.
A few minutes later, Stan hears somthing. “Xev?” he calls. “No. Vlad.” She bites him. 790 rushes up. “You look evil. Are you any threat to my beloved dead man in black?” “Yes. I will destroy him” 790 (bless it’s little, well 790 dosen’t have a heart) trys to knock her off the bridge. She picks him up and throws him.
Xev and Kai arrive. “Stan we have to get Kai into cryostasis” Stan dosen’t respond and Vlad appears . She grabs Kai “Time is up, last of the Brunnin-G” Xev screams and hits her. “You are a strong one” Vlad admires, dropping Kai “you will make an excellent slave” “Run” Kai tells Xev, and she does. “I live for the hunt” Vlad says and chases.
Xev is running through the Lexx.
Kai is on the bridge. He trys to tell Stan to fight her, and then “Vlad wants you to take me to my cryopod” Stan steps on him “No she does not”.”I give myself to her. I can do nothing if frozen.” So Stan drags him to the cryochamber.
Vlad finds Xev and bites her. “You are mine, forever” “I am yours, forever” Xev repeats. They go to the cryochamber.
“Your time is almost up. Our lady is coming for you” says Stan, (also stroking his cheek!- which would be nice but -) “Fight it Stan. You have a will of your own” “no I do not” Vlad shows up. “There is no light in this dark universe, Kai. Only me” and picks him up. “I find this moment extremly satisfying” “You will not have me Vlad” “I will have you. Tell me you love me” “I love you” Stan says. “Kai! Tell me you love me” She stretches out her tentacle. Kai lurches back, to the side of the cryopod, Vlad follows. “Mine, mine, mine” and inserts it.
Xev screams her Cluster Lizard scream, rolls into a ball and knocks Vlad into the cryopod. “Stan, close it” she yells. Stan manages to. “I am not your slave, I never thought of Vlad as a human being and you do not controal me” she snarls at Vlad.
Stan is fighting with himself, trying not to open the cryopod. “Father Borsht said the beast cannot dim the light of a pure heart, you have a pure heart Stanley” “No, I don’t, I serve-”
Xev knocks him out “Yes you do”. She walks over to Kai, who tells her that they must clense Stanley and find the protoblood. “You could at least say thank you” she says. “Thank you”Xev heads to a moth, where she finds Kai’s protoblood (Vlad took it with, I guess). She heads back to the bridge, where Stan is tied up and hooked to the protien regenerator. Kai replentishes his protoblood. “You have a pure heart Stan” Xev says. “Vlad is my master, Vlad is my master, Vlad- whoa thats a scary thought!” he says. “790, is his blood clean now?” she asks. “No, it is a foul effluence. But it is free of the parablood. She unties him.
And the show ends. Any questions?
Wowsers, what I would give too see the battle, I honestly never thought it possible that Kai would get a can of whoopass opened on him!!!
Mind you old Vlad is cheating, trying to defeat Kai by draining his protoblood, cowardly cow thing, she wouldn’t last five minutes if it weren’t for her tentacle, and her weapons, oh and her invincibilty, but other than that Kai would kick her all over the place.
It did seem easy to get her into the cryopod though, and I can’t believe that will be all we get from Vlad, but I wonder what they intend to do to her now, at some point Kai is going to have to retrieve the protoblood he’s lost, trouble is, she’s got it.
I bet you are wishing time travel was a reality, so you could all skip the seven days between now and next friday!!!
Saddy is so lucky, he’s in the UK and he gets’s to see it, while poor ol squishy has to suffer, what fresh hell is this???
Anyway, most excellent update Hypatia, as usual I’m looking forward to next week’s (it’s not far off wanting see the actual programme), god bless you Hypatia for doing this for little ol’ me.
Squishy [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_smile.gif[/img]
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.