a friend of mine died
quote:
Originally posted by FX:
[b] i too do not have the solace of a traditional christian view of the afterlife; i make do with vague ideas of lifeforces as you say too important to be crushed by mere physical death, and like you when i think of a loved one’s death, i not only hide, i very superstitiously try to think of my own death, i guess to draw any bad karma onto myself rather than them…how’s that for silly? i guess it’s my own primitive attempts at magickal thinking but it soothes me that i may have soothed the gods into ignoring my loved ones for awhile (can you believe a ‘rational’ scientific type is admitting to this) but i guess death makes children of us all…[/b]
Actually, FX, I do believe it. Fantasies of death are common with me. It helps me understand the process of death and rebirth. on another note, here’s a life lesson I had, it might help explain.
– Once a famous Star Trek actor – Mark Leonard, (Spock’s Father, Sarek/Romulan Commander/Klingon)dragged me to the side of an acting class that I was auditing. He had been watching me view the performance.
Standing over me, a giant of a man, he pressed his face close to mine and said,
“Amanda.” (Egad, he called me by my name!)
“Why don’t you take some acting classes?”
I shuddered and replied in a quivering voice, “I…I…I’m a musician.”
He stood to full height and laughed.
“Then you’re already half there! Why, acting is just like music!”
I tried to walk away, but he followed me.
“Won’t you try?” He held out his hand.
I crumpled.
“No…It’s too hard..all those emotions! I’d crack up!”
Mr. Leonard’s features softened, and he leaned in close to me and whispered,
“No, it keeps us from cracking up. It’s a release! We don’t need headshrinks…we do it for ourselves, on the stage.”
Needless to say, I had no more words for him.
He looked at my faceful of mixed emotions and could see that I was confused.
“Well, you think it over.”
With that, he gathered up the crew and invited me to dinner.
He held dinner like it was the last supper. He broke the bread and poured the wine for everyone. I was unconfortable, sitting at that table, knowing that I should do what he asked.
5 years later I learned of his death.
Interesting, how one person can teach so much, with so few words?
I do alot of pretending. It’s MY fantasy…no one can take it away from me.
If I choose to, I can be anyone anywhere.
That is my strength.
That is my religion.
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~~~Rustam~~~ “Help me, Lexx is eating my brain!”~~~~