Battlestar Galactica: Cultures: Cylons
The Cylons are humanoid machines first created by the humans of the Twelve Colonies. Their original purpose was to make the lives of the colonists easier by performing mundane tasks. However as the Cylons gained popularity the colonists required that more work be performed by their mechanical servants. To accomplish this feat, the humans had to increase the intelligence of the Cylons. This was humanities greatest mistake. And like almost every other science friction story in the last 50 years (Terminator, Dune, Matrix…); the machines with their added intelligence, realized that they were being used and abused, and revolted. What followed was a 20 year power struggle. After a long and bloody war an armistice was declared.
The Cylons fled the Twelve Colonies for their own new world. For forty years, no human had ever heard or seen a Cylon. The Cylons used this time to improve their technology and programming to wipe out the human plague once and for all.
Cylon humour: 10100110111011101110011011110011 10101100001100101110011101
(this is a real joke, try to figure it out)
During this strategic truce, the Cylons went from being walking toasters to a more advanced model. This new model was more humanoid in appearance, had faster processors, and was more capable of fighting, but it still lacked the wisdom and mobility of an organic being. With the added intelligence came the inevitable creation of religion.
These new models adopted the religion similar to that of the colonists. They believe that it was their duty to destroy the humans in God’s name, since they were now the chosen creation. But first they add to improve themselves further, they had to give themselves more emotion, they had to give themselves a soul. After years of work, they accomplished that task, they created twelve models of biocylon.
Cylons that are similar in all ways to humans, save a superior intelligence and the immortality that comes with making a daily backup copy.Currently the Cylons are involved with eliminating the remnants of humanity, to complete their jihad against those who have fallen out of God’s grace. But first they have to find those few remaining refugees.
|Race Rating – Cylon|
|Personality||1 (rancid butter) –||5 (cool dude)||1|
|Attractiveness||1 (requires paper bag) –||5 (Drop-dead-gorgeous)||2|
|Humour||1 (stomach-turning) –||5 (sidesplitting)||1|
|Dress Sense||1 (laughable) –||5 (hip)||1|
|Aggression||1 (big/little softy) –||5 (hard as nails)||5|
|Social Standing||1 (scumbag) –||5 (god)||3|
Sad Geezer Race Rating (out of 30) = 13
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Battlestar Galactica reviews are © 2005 Ryan Bechtel
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