LEXX: Biography: Wist

The lovely Doreen Jaccobi played Wist.

Wist plays the lovely but deadly parasitic predator on Klaagia. She controlled the unfortunate occupants of the planet by infecting them with satellite worms, which attach themselves to the spinal cord of the host, and by doing so, controls their brains.

If you were to meet Wist in a pub you would wonder why all Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!the blokes were acting like morons. If you were female you’d think she was an underage drinker and accuse your boyfriend of drinking too much. If you were a bloke, you’d leave the pub a moron.

Wist was originally one of the last occupants of the planet to succumb to the predator. She attempted to kill the Queen and was unsuccessful. A later attempt resulted in the queen taking over her body.

She wears a terrific leather cat suit with lots of holes in it, and doesn’t look menacing at all. She looks very attractive and a little insecure. In fact this is her main attribute. Primarily because of her looks, she is able to gain certain affection from male visitors to the planet and after a very short and sweet introduction asks “do you like me?” She uses this line very effectively, it usually results in a kiss and this is when she infects her victim.

A kiss from Wist wins you a satellite worm and a personality, which can best be described as that of a moron. The infected morons then look for other victims for her and also collect for her a light green liquid called pattern.

Pattern is the essence of life for this creature. It is extracted from living tissue by a sort of ‘glopeta-glopeta’ machine controlled by the leader of the morons, Bog.

She had an altercation with Kai, which resulted in her head being chopped off. The head rolled into a large hole, which was used to store pattern and Big Wist, was born. The pattern congealed to produce a very large and powerful Wist, which hoped to move to another planet on-board the LEXX. Do you like me?

Big Wist was destroyed however, when she bit into the LEXX as it took off from Klaagia. LEXX has great self-preservation characteristics. It blew up the planet Klaagia and a large piece flew into Big Wist smashing her head off.

Wist is known for giving Stanley Tweedle the only decent kiss he’s had in years.

Doreen Jacobi was to have been the fifth crew-member of the LEXX but was unable to take-up the offer due to contractual difficulties.

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This review is © 1999-2019 Tony Fawl.
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