Andromeda: S02E17: The Things we Cannot Change
An epsiode review by phoenixfire31
“Home is the sailor,
Fragment of Ancient Earth Text,
“Why is it that the most beautiful things are always the most dangerous,” asks Beka as the Maru comes upon a black hole, which is actually quite stunning. “They do it on purpose.” Says Tyr as he eyes the black hole warily. But for Rommie the black hole gives her Goosebumps cause you know lots of bad memories. Beka, of course, wants to know why the tiny Maru went instead of the big and strong Andromeda. The problem is that Andromeda is too big, Tyr starts to go on about math equations and two masses blah blah blah but stops at a look from Beka that says what are you talking about, no one cares.
Meanwhile Dylan in an AV suit (all but his helmet) is in the bowels of the Maru listening to his crew and giving our some final orders before he leaves. Apparently Captain Hunt is about to go collect some data from the black hole, he tells the crew about crazy but cute Harper stockpiling food. But before he can finish there’s a hullbreach. He starts yelling while snow is flying all around him and alarms sound throughout the Maru. As Dylan grabs his helmet, and puts it on, the alarms sounding the hull breach turns into the sound of an alarm clock and Dylan is all naked in bed with some blond. No not Beka. He turns of the alarm and tells her to go back to bed, but she would prefer to do
the nasty with our gallant captain and as they start going at it, we cut to the intro.
Now we see a beautiful planet and a house right on the waterfront
surrounded by pretty plants and flying birds. Naked Dylan and his naked lady friend named Liandra are making out in bed when some kid comes in yelling daddy, apparently he’s talking about our Dylan. The kid wants pancakes and Dylan agrees but decides to make out with mommy first.
Now the crew, minus Dylan, are on the Andromeda Tyr is saying that trying looking through the black hole is like trying to look through mud. Rommie remarks that she can see through mud and this is much more difficult. Dylan is out there somewhere and they can’t find him. Harper makes his entrance on the bridge and wants to know why they don’t just go and get Dylan. So Beka tells Rommie to move forward, as they move forward the ship starts shaking and making this screaming sound. Beka orders Andromeda to back off and we’re back where we began. “Gravity sucks.” But never fear because Harper is here and he is going to solve the problem. Harper tells Trance that he is going to need her help and the two head off the bridge.
Back on the pretty planet Dylan is making pancakes and telling his kid have some patience because his pancakes will be done soon; the kid is kicking around a soccer ball and basically being a kid. Apparently cooking is not one of Dylan’s strong suits because he compares his pancake batter to cement mix. Yum, but I’m not complaining, he could make me cement pancakes any day of the week. Then all of the sudden the scene changes to Fleet Marshal Culchain from the episode ‘The Honey Offering’ the part where the fleet marshal is wining about missing his sons birthday but has to because he needs to fight Andromeda. Now back to Dylan in his all white house looking at his kid kind of confused.
Beka and Tyr have decided to go and get Dylan. Harper rigged a slip-fighter to take them and Beka tells Tyr not to come because she knows about the Neitzschean need for survival. The Neitzschean self preservation gene, But Tyr goes into this whole monologue which can be summed up into “me like women do lots to impress” Beka finds this very funny and says “All these macho dangerous things you do is to impress the chicks.” Tyr chuckles and secretly wonders if it’s working. It is.
Back to Dylan and his wife in the obnoxiously all white kitchen talking about Dylan’s days in the academy. The wife is wondering if Dylan is still having nightmares, he’s tells her about a nightmare at the academy where he forgot to study for a test. They wife tells him not to forget and hands him a paper. She gives him a kiss (with tongue) boy if I was this kid I would be seriously grossed out by now and tells him that she loves him. Now the scene moves to Dylan’s message to Sarah, saying goodbye from the episode the ‘Banks of Lethe’. Back at Dylan’s house he is looking at a piece of paper, that turns out to be his resignation from the highgaurd. “I’m retiring?” asks a confused Dylan. Beka and Tyr are in their AV suits and clomping down a hall on the Maru. But Dylan isn’t there. “That answers that question and only one question remains” says Tyr as they stare around the empty Maru and the beautiful black hole. “Where is he?” Asks Beka. Now we see Dylan in his AV suit floating along the edge of a black hole.
Back at the pretty waterfront house. Dylan’s wife is starting to get ready to go somewhere she’s laying cloths out on the bed then we move back to Dylan and Tyr walking down the hallway and Dylan yelling at Tyr for messing up back when he fired for Harper in the episode ‘D Minus Zero.’
Back on the pretty planet Dylan wants to know what Liandra is doing with his uniform as she lays it out on the bed. But she said they talked about it she’s giving them away. Apparently Dylan has some memory issues. And ever since the black hole Dylan sees neitzschean in the bushes and Calderans behind the moon. The wife tells Dylan that they are at peace and he needs to chill out. She wants to call a doctor but Dylan says that he is fine, but Laindra is determined to help him.
On the Maru Tyr is doing some repair work. He tells Beka that the AV suit should protect Dylan from the radiation. Gravity is the only issue. Beka tells Tyr about her time in an AV suit, she tells him that it felt like she spent days in space but it was quite peaceful.
Dylan is playing soccer with his son. His son is talking about when Dylan decides to ‘tired’ his mom told him it would be like a vacation. His son wants him to retire so they can play soccer all the time hey laying it on a little thick there kid. But then Dylan has another memory of the Magog world ship from the episode ‘.It’s Hour Come Round at Last’ Dylan’s wife has come in with flowers. Dylan tells his wife that there are “trillions of Magog raping and killing there way through the galaxy.” But she’s never heard of Magog where has she been under a rock the size of Texas. Back to ‘It’s Hour Come Round at Last‘ when the magog begin to board the Andromeda and Dylan gets attacked then a shot of when the Magog attack the ship with PSP’S. Liandra is wondering what is wrong, but he’s says nothing is wrong, and that’s the problem, happy home and healthy son. He says that he is hallucinating and that she is not his wife and none of this is real. He yells to no one in particular, “I’m on to you, now tell me what the hell is going on here.”
Back on the Maru things are up and working, but Beka still can’t find Dylan. She hits the panel hoping for more results and Tyr comments that he’s tried that but in rarely works. She hits it again and we move to Dylan throwing a shoe on the ground. Saying that they are good, but they messed up because they forgot about the Magog. He’s going through drawers and looking under the bed he takes off his cloths and looks to see if they messed with him medically but he can’t find anything. “Maybe I’m in the zoo.” Dylan is thinking that he’s with some advanced species who is trying to mess with him. “This incredibly real facsimile.” Dylan finds his force lance in the back of the closet where Liandra had hidden it. She was worried he would hurt himself not her or their son. Liandra thinks that Dylan may be suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome Dylan says that can’t be right because Dylan survived the fall of the universe, what could be more traumatic. Death is the answer to that question Liandra tells Dylan that he was in an AV suit to long, ran out of air and was clinically dead, he’s never been the same since.
Harper has decided to use his transport machine from episode ‘The Banks of Lethe.’ Trance reminds him that in only worked once and weirdly at that. He reminds her that it only worked when they were sitting next to a black hole, which they are now. Harper tells Trance to “think some good thoughts give some of that good love of yours.”
Dylan is in bed and pulls out his force lance from his bedside table as we go back to the episode ‘Under the Night’ with Raday and Dylan fighting. Now back to reality then to Dylan and Tyr in ‘Exit Strategies’ when they are running away from neitzschean in the snow. Then back to Dylan in bed then back to another time when Dylan was fighting in some episode. Then back to Dylan who has his gun and sees his reflection in the mirror and shoots but the mirror doesn’t break it absorbs the shots, his wife ( who is naked but covered with a sheet) wakes up and is screaming. Hey should she really be sleeping with someone who has memory issues that seems kind of wrong to me. He tries to make it better and apologize but she demands that he leave.
Back on the Maru Harper is saying that the teleportation device won’t work unless they now exactly where Dylan is, they tried with a fish but with less than steller results “tuna tar tar” says Trance. Rommie starts going on about how the black hole is too new and the age is making this difficult and then goes into the math but then stops when she realizes no one cares. But fortunately back on the Maru Tyr has found Dylan, “damn Tyr you got him,” said Beka”I located him but weather or not we can get him is
still very much in question.”
Back on the planet Dylan and his wife are talking, Dylan is saying that maybe she is right, that maybe he did break down. But he doesn’t want to retire he just wants to take a break, he still wants to serve now Dylan has gone from wearing white to wearing grey, maybe the outfit color change is supposed to be symbolic of something but I don’t know, I hate symbolism. The Dylan starts talking about his mission and his crew. “My poor baby” says the wife and then tells Dylan that the Andromeda was lost. He doesn’t believe her but she goes on about how they were sucked into a black hole trying to rescue Dylan. Dylan gets a flash of Andromeda slowing being sucked into a black hole.
Back at white house Dylan is looking at a button, and is wondering about Andromeda gone flash to the episode ‘Star Crossed’ when Rommie wants to be dismantled. “No.” says Dylan back at his house, he goes to see his son and is all dressed in black now. He has his uniform and says that he won’t
abandon his post. Liandra is cooking near the stove and something spills and catches fire. Dylan picks up his son and yells at Liandra to run but she won’t move, then we see the red guy from the ‘…It’s Hour Come Round at Last.’ Back to the white house hey for anyone who might be confused, like my computer which wants to capitalize the words ‘white house’ it’s not the white house like where the president lives but a house that is painted a really annoyingly bright white anyway the fire just stops, and Dylan is confused because she risked her child’s life to prove a point. But Liandra says everything is fine. He thinks that he know who she his. She calls him a megalomaniac, because he is calling her demon Dylan pulls a gun and wants to know who she is. Back to Ourobros where Dylan and Trance are talking at the end and he is wondering what to do with the new Trance. Back at the white house Liandra is begging Dylan to calm down.
Trance and Rommie are trying to teleport Dylan but they are having some problems. Liandra becomes Trance for a moment and we can hear Trance say, “you can make it I know you can,” urging Dylan to come back, but then his son pulls Dylan’s force lance down. Dylan in his AV suit is calling for them to stop because it’s pulling him apart.
Back at the white house Liandra is telling Dylan to resign and get help or she will take their son and leave. But Dylan says he can’t quit. He says people need him but Liandra says that the people who need then are right here and she wants to protect him she tells Dylan that the highgaurd doesn’t want him. That Dylan messed up and they’re tired of cleaning up after him, back to Dylan and the ship in the episode ‘To Loose the Fateful Lightning,’ heading from the sun when a system was destroyed. Back at white house he says he made a mistake, destroying a system and unleashing a bunch of monsters on innocent people and Dylan gets a flashback from the episode ‘The Devil Take Hindmost,’ when the colony decided to become Magog, hey I thought she never heard of the Magog. Liandra wants Dylan to take what they gave him, full pension honorable retirement. But he won’t quit. Now Dylan flashes back to ‘the Prince’ when Rommie kills all the snipers, with tweedle dee and tweedle dum. Back at the white house Dylan says that he calls the shots on his life.
Back on the Maru Tyr is planning to go and get Dylan he’s all decked out in his AV suit with a cable attached so he won’t get lost. Beka who is in her AV suit minus the helmet is kind of worried she tells Tyr that “If you are doing all of this to impress chicks,” she gives him a kiss, but really kisses the plastic front part of his helmet, and says “I’m impressed.”
Back at the house Dylan doesn’t know what his wife is maybe it’s a part of him who wants to quit. Back to ‘the Banks of Lethe’ when he is saying goodbye to Sarah when he tells her that the common wealth is bigger than the two of them. Sara saying I love you, Liandra saying I love you. Liandra tells him that he has no choice Dylan kisses her and says he does have a choice. Back to fighting in ‘.It’s Hour Come Round at Last’ when Dylan is injured from the Magog and is telling Beka that they are all gonna get medals. Back to the white house Dylan saying he’s always had a choice and throws his resignation which is on fire.
Tyr can see Dylan and is getting closer but he is just out of reach and Tyr is out of line. Back at the white house where the kid is begging Dylan not to leave him. Tyr unhooks, Beka tells him to be careful. Tyr holds on to the line with one hand and reaches for Dylan’s hand with the other.
Dylan is saying that they know how much he loves being married and having kids. But he wants to know why they are doing this “Because you are killing my people,” says Liandra and we see a black hole in her eyes like the red guy. Back to Dylan firing at a black hole in some episode-firing missile at a black hole. Back in reality Dylan wakes up and reaches for Dylan’s hand, They grab hold and Tyr tells Beka to real them in.
Back on Andromeda, Dylan is saying it’s glad to be over. Rommie says he hallucination was from hypoxia. Harper says maybe it want’ a dream, Trance quickly, almost to quickly, says it must have been a very bad dream and Dylan says that dreams tell you who you are Dylan says that he is Dylan’s and he is in control and they fly off.
OK so this episode totally screamed Dylan filler but anyway, it wasn’t that bad. Usually episodes with clips are meant to help new viewers catch up on the show, but if this was the first or one of the first episodes I had seen I would be wondering things like, whose that purple girl and what’s up with the brunette who won’t stop crying. The clips may have had some deep meaning that went along with whatever scene we were in, but I didn’t pick up on it. I will say that I loved the parts with the rest of the crew trying to save Dylan, It was cool to see how far they have come in only one year, the fact that not once did the crew think of leaving Dylan and taking advantage of the Andromeda as they would have before, they worked together and worked well.
The Dylan parts were ok even though every scifi television show ever has done the episode where a character gets tricked into thinking they are crazy and needs to believe in themselves blah blah blah. I know I’m gonna get flamed for this by the make readers but there was just way to much sex in the Dylan universe, I mean if you are dating someone who is mentally unstable sex should not be your first priority. And doing all that in front of their kid ew, sorry but I prefer the platonic view of parents, you know separate beds, but anyway. This episode was pretty good and way easier to watch than to read.
The “The Things We Cannot Change ” episode review is © 2002 phoenixfire31. Not for reproduction without the authors express permission
The names, characters and everything else associated with Gene Roddenberry’s Andromeda TV series are the property of the Tribune Entertainment Company. All rights reserved.
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