LEXX: S02E16: The Net
This was a serious show! The depth of Mantrid’s destruction is finally beginning to be felt by the LEXX crew. 790 lists the number of galaxies that are disappearing then tells everyone, “In 31.29 days this universe will be gone.” The Light Zone is rapidly being dismantled by Mantrid Drone Arms – things are made considerably worse when Stanley realises that he has misplaced his hat!
The whole mass of the universe will gradually be converted into Mantrid Drones. Even the porthole that would have allowed them to escape into the Dark Zone has disappeared.
The port-hole is a phenomenon that relies on a number of other objects to exert a force on other objects which cannot happen if those objects no longer exist. It looks as if the LEXX and it’s crew are stuck in the Light Zone and force to watch the destruction until, as Mantrid promised, they too will be disassembled!
Kai suggests that they head for the Centre of the Universe where there is a phenomenon called The Greater Uncertainty Principal. It is uncertain what happens with such a phenomenon since no-one has ever travelled there and successfully returned. He suggests that if they stay where they are, they will be destroyed by Mantrid’s handy gadgets.
But if they go to the centre of the universe, it could be said with a fair degree of certainty that their fates would most certainly be…… uncertain… if you see what I mean. Stan clutches at straws! He realises that this is their only hope of escape and tells the LEXX to head for the Centre of the Universe.
And yet, Stanley becomes gradually preoccupied with the loss of his hat, it’s as if he needs to take his mind of their impending doom. He even looks for it where Xev is taking a shower (good thinking Stan!), but he could equally have been looking for it where she was getting undressed or while she was retiring to go to bed! He tries to persuade Xev that they should ‘get together’ because they will be at the centre of the universe where of course, their future is uncertain.
Stan returns to the bridge where the LEXX reports that they see a Web, a BIG Web. He requests that they change course but Stanley issues the command too late and the ship is caught in the Web’s giant tentacles. The LEXX is violently buffeted and the crew are rendered unconscious.
Xev is the first to wake, she finds 790 who warns her that there is something terribly wrong (No-shit Sherlock!). They find Stanley still unconscious and he seems to have some dark green liquid dribbling from his mouth. Xev tries to revive him and as she does so, he says sternly, “Cut cord to Kai” He also manages to tell Xev that Kai is in the passage that runs parallel to the LEXX’s ‘Primitive Primary Ganglion’ (?! Left at the traffic lights by the post office!) Then he looks Xev straight in the eye and says seriously, “Hurry, it’s killing us.”
Stern stuff! Kai is located and Xev cuts a cord from an ugly looking creature that has attached itself to his head. Kai revives immediately but has no recollection of what happened. Later Stanley also seems to have managed to revive himself. None of the crew, including the LEXX, know what happened. The ship is continuing it’s journey toward the centre of the Universe and there is no explanation of the collision with the Web or how they managed to escape.
Everyone feels uneasy though. Stanley attempts to find out what happens by getting the LEXX to replay the last seconds before it hit the Web, but as you would expect from a show which has 30 minutes left, the screen goes blank. The same occurs when they try to ‘play back’ 790, although the robot head is convinced that Stan is, in some way, being controlled.
The ship settles down and they continue their journey, but there are certain unsettling noises and strange happenings on the ship. Kai attempts to hook up one of the optic nerves of LEXX to 790’s eye screens. They discover that the LEXX never actually broke free of the Web! They work out that the Web is controlling the LEXX through a direct connection to it’s brain core above the bridge. Kai cuts the chord and Stanley orders the LEXX to fire at the Web.
And that seems to have taken care of that!
Zev manages to find Stanley’s cap and takes it to him, “I want to give it to you.” She says. Stanley, thinking that she has finally come round to her senses and wants to make grunting/groaning/squelching noises with him, puckers up in anticipation.
Then there is a scream from 790 on the bridge!!! I’m not sure if this is because he is jealous of Stan’s advances, or that Xev has indeed succumbed or maybe that Stanley has turned into a viscous monster that is about to violently attack Xev (naaa, maybe not).
The show ends there? It’s either a ‘cliff-hanger’ or a ‘damp squib’ of an ending! As you will see however, the next episode reveals all. Did she give him a cap or a bonk! (or both!) You’ll just have to wait until next weeks thrilling instalment!
Not the most favourite of LEXX shows, but the direction was good and the acting tight. I thought Stan actually looked pretty cool without his hat!
I rate this episode a cool 27,427 out of 10. What did you think?
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This episode review is © 1999-2019 Tony Fawl.
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